Orgasm Control

In-depth Exploration of Orgasm Control in BDSM: Unraveling the Intricacies of Edging, Chastity, Ruined Orgasms, Forced Orgasms, and Post-Orgasm Torment

If you have followed me for long enough, you’re likely already familiar with the concept of Orgasm Control. However, for those uninitiated, or those wanting to dive deeper into this fascinating form of play (which also happens to be my personal favourite and forte), this blog is just for you. Your first order is to view my wishlist, apply online to be my servant, and book in person sessions.

Orgasm control is all about the thrilling power dynamics surrounding the timing and nature of a person’s orgasm, and covers a range of different activities and techniques. This style of play can provide an incredibly rewarding experience for all involved, heightening any eventual and deepening your submission to me. Simultaneously, it can be intensely frustrating, creating a unique form of pleasure drawn from the denial of orgasm and the building of tension and anticipation. In this comprehensive blog post, we will delve deeper into various orgasm control practices within BDSM, exploring their nuances and discussing the transformative benefits they can bring to your BDSM sessions.

Edging: The Delicate Dance of Anticipation

Edging, a widely practiced and wildly popular form of orgasm control, is all about a delicate dance of anticipation. This technique involves taking a person tantalizingly close to the brink of orgasm, only to withdraw all stimulation before they finally cross the threshold into climax. This can be accomplished manually through a partner’s skilled touch or by employing sex toys such as vibrators and milking machines.

The overarching aim of edging is to intensify tension, anticipation and frustration which culminates in an eventual orgasm that is far more potent and gratifying than a typical climax. Naturally, the more edgings you have, usually the more intense that final release will be (if I allow you to have release at all… I have been known to send submissives away completely denied on my more sadistic days!)

Chastity: The Power of Sexual Denial

Chastity is another popular form of orgasm control. It involves the use of a specially designed device, commonly referred to as a chastity cage. This device effectively prevents the wearer from touching or stimulating their genitals, in fact it can even stop you from getting an erection (and some cages are designed to be especially painful when you do).

This ties in with the concept of ‘key holding’. The key to this cage is held by your Mistress, who decides if and when you are to be unlocked at all. This is a powerful form of control, and the intensity of chastity play is second to none. When the submissive is denied any and all forms of sexual release until the Mistress allows it, it has the tendency to really increase your focus and obedience to her.

However, I will offer a warning that chastity is one of those fantasies which sometimes doesn’t quite translate to reality for some. Whilst the thought of wearing a cock cage for your Dommes seems super-hot in a horny moment, waking up with a painful erection and no way to unlock can really break that fantasy. My advice is to take your time, slowly introducing chastity into your sessions, then short bursts of your daily life, before getting locked up for longer stretches. Easing into chastity gradually is definitely the best way of testing how much of this fantasy you can handle in real life.

Ruined Orgasms: The Bittersweet Symphony of Frustration

Ruined orgasms offer a unique and playful twist on orgasm control (and is my personal favourite way to torment my submissives!). This method involves taking a person right up to the very cusp of orgasm and then abruptly stopping all stimulation just before they climax. Unlike edging, where the aim is complete denial, a ruined orgasm involves continued stimulation for just a few extra seconds beyond the edge, leading to a smaller and much less satisfying orgasm.

This can be an incredibly frustrating experience, feeling more like a very intense edging than an actual release for the person being stimulated, yet paradoxically, it can also be highly arousing, adding a bittersweet symphony to the session. Often you can continue playing beyond ruined orgasms, giving yet more edgings and ruinings without the usual refractory period. Mostly, I just find it hilarious to watch you be completely mind fucked as you witness yourself have an orgasm but feel none of the pleasurable release you usually do!

Forced Orgasms: The Erotic Overload

Forced orgasms form another variant of orgasm control that involves stimulating a person until they achieve orgasm, regardless of their readiness or willingness to climax. As with other forms of orgasm control, this can be achieved with manual stimulation or toys such as vibrators, but I think this is best suited to milking machines. Something about being hooked up to a machine designed to make you orgasm regardless of your willingness certainly helps you feel more vulnerable and obedience to the Mistress controlling it!

Forced orgasms can lead to an overwhelming sensory experience, as the person being stimulated loses control over their timing. This type of play pushes the boundaries of pleasure, leading to an erotic overload that can be incredibly intense, particularly if it comes at the very end of a prolonged period in chastity, finally unlocked and given some extended edging and ruined orgasms first!

Post-Orgasm Torment: Pleasure and Pain in Unison

Post-orgasm torment is a type of orgasm control that involves continued stimulation after a person has already climaxed. Which often leads to a highly intense experience. For some, the pleasure derived from an orgasm is so powerful that any additional stimulation post-climax can be almost unbearable as you are so sensitive to any form of touch. A perfect way to add a little dash of pain into the mix of orgasm control play, and especially good for those who enjoy other forms of CBT yet cannot be left with any marks. This practice really blurs the lines between pleasure and pain, adding an extra level of intensity and heat to orgasm control sessions.

The Multidimensional Benefits of Orgasm Control Play

Embracing orgasm control play can offer a wealth of benefits for the submissive. The act of being denied sexual release can be intensely arousing. The tension and anticipation that build up from all this denial can create a heightened sense of expectancy, making the eventual release even more satisfying. It’s also my experience that this level of play is excellent for those who aren’t so much into pain or who cannot be left with any marks, and yet still want to experience a real loss of control and power. The denial of pleasure can be far more intense than the dishing out of pain if done correctly, and on top of that I find it really does encourage you to be on your best behaviour. Denial helps you to focus, increase your obedience, your obsession, and your submission.


By exploring various forms of orgasm control—such as edging, chastity, ruined orgasms, forced orgasms, and post-orgasm torment—you can deepen your submission while embarking on a journey of sexual discovery as guided by an expert Dominatrix. These practices allow you to push boundaries, explore new sensations, and unlock new levels of trust and vulnerability.

Until next time,

Manchester Mistress Dominatrix BDSM Ashton Under Lyne Playspace Chambers Dungeon Fetish FemDom Kinky - 484
Manchester Mistress Expert Dominatrix Lola Ruin

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